I'm feeling much better about my submission this last week. It has been a week of many orgasms and my normal hyper aroused self!
It started last Wednesday when around 10pm, he told me to stop what I was doing and cum five times. I was elated and after the first orgasm, I was able to watch porn and linger in my fantasies without fear of cuming too fast.
The following night, to kick off the start of a new NFL season Sir told me that every time the Seahawks scored points I could cum but when the Green Bay Packers scored, I must wear the nipple clamps for two minutes. The Seahawks were their usual awesome selves so I ended up getting five orgasms! Their legendary offense allowed the Packer's to score just 3 times but we didn't start until after the first touchdown so I only ended up wearing them for a total of 4 minutes. Good thing too! After putting them on the first time, I realized that I have not worn them in a long time and I definitely lost my tolerance.
Although I must admit, being the horny masochist I am, I did get turned on by wearing them! It is just the taking them off that I don't like. Especially without Sir there to distract me from the pain with his mouth... Yes, it is definitely time to get my tolerance back up!
It was really a great night! I felt so good and so submissive after my multiple orgasms and just the right amount of nipple pain. I slept better that night than I had in awhile.
Another thing that happened that made me realize I was on track happened on Saturday. I had been doing very unsubmissive things all morning when I had this overwhelming craving for pain, forcefulness and sex of course. I never don't want sex. That is a given! But the pain and desire to be taken and forced to his will permeated my whole being! I imagined him overtaking my complete essence and me being absolutely obedient to anything and everything he wanted. These thoughts overwhelmed me for a few minutes. My pussy was wet and I couldn't focus on even the smallest task.
I soon brought myself back to reality but couldn't shake that need for physical and mental domination and my concentration was seriously interrupted by deviant thoughts for the rest of the day. By around 11:30pm I was so horny and wound up and I needed to cum. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep if I didn't. I texted Sir and was so relieved when he told me to cum twice!
Then. yesterday morning as I was settling into work, he texted one work "cum". I can't even begin to explain the chemical reaction in my body. It was like bring jolted by electricity. I was on a mission and nothing was going to stop me. I quickly ran to my car but there were too many people around and I didn't want to get arrested! So I went back inside and went into the bathroom. By that point, I was wet and my pussy was aching! I barely had time to fantasize when I came. Hard. Luckily no one came in :)
So, as you can see, it was quite the stimulating week!
I feel revitalized in my submission. I'm feeling it more mentally and physically now. It makes me realize how detrimental my actions in July were. It is just now finally back to normal and I'm so happy!
The only way this week could have been better was if I could have fucked Sir. But that is for him to decide when and where. I know it's not my place to demand things. In the past, I would have gotten anxious and irritable but I now feel at peace and confident knowing that when the time is right he will have me come to him. I've come along way in this aspect of my submission and the sense of serenity I feel is almost spiritual.
As for my ad requesting ideas and fantasies? I must have received 75 responses and they are still trickling in. The first thing I noticed was how many people asked about and offered things totally irrelevant to my ad. Mostly propositions. I reread my ad and I did not, in any uncertain terms, say that I was looking to hook up with any one. About 90% of the responses were about how I could write about all of the very graphic things after they did them to me. Some of them were very off putting especially ones about domination. I can't and don't want to imagine anyone dominating me but Sir. In fact, the thought of it is downright repulsive to me. The most enjoyable responses were the ones where they told a general story as opposed to telling me what they would do to me.
I also learned how lucky I am when it comes to finding women to share with Sir. So many people out there have trouble finding a threesome! I admit it is probably the most difficult type of person to find and to actually form some kind of relationship with but Sir and I have done it many times. Not that it was always easy. I remember the incredible stress and anxiety it caused me in the beginning and there were many times I thought it would never happen. The more experienced and confident I got, the easier it was to find willing ladies. This is most likely because I no longer give off the air of desperation. My attitude is that if something with any given woman works out that's great. If not, it kind of sucks, but I just go on to the next one. I heard from people who have been trying for a long time and never even found a single unicorn and hoped I would help. That's sad but sorry, it's not going me.
I thought it was interesting that Sir and I already have fulfilled many of these fantasies that I heard about including the following:
- Rape/break in
- MFF threesome
- exhibitionism like at a sex club
- outdoor sex
- Orgasm on demand . Boy did I have trouble with that at first now it's so ingrained that it requires no thought or effort on my part. It just happens. So amazing!
- Orgasm control and denial
- sex with threat of getting caught (this makes me nostalgic for his old car...)
- piercing and tattooing as a sign of submission.
We are very compatible and our kinks match up nearly perfect. He often has this sixth sense of what I need and just how far to take me. Much to my amazement Recently I realized that I can't hide my emotions with him as much as I like to think I can. He can read me quite well. Maybe even better than anyone. I'm not sure how I feel about that this....
This was a very special week not only because it was filled with light-hearted, sexy fun and perpetual arousal. It's because for the first time in awhile I didn't feel bad or guilty or regretting something I had done wrong or to disappoint him. I feel so much sexier, submissive and fulfilled this way. Both Sir and I deserve happiness and a life overrun with positive drama and I plan on doing everything in my power to make sure it stays like this!
Thank you Sir for bringing happiness and sexual electricity to my week.I am honored to submit to you and appreciate you more than you know :)