Showing posts with label rituals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rituals. Show all posts

Thursday, June 5, 2014

New Rules

In real life, other people's rules are annoying. I understand they are a necessary evil but they range anywhere from mildly annoying to a huge hassle. This is not true of Sir's rules. I love his rules. I crave them and most importantly, they keep me accountable and focused on my submission. In an tumultuous, always changing world they make me feel safe and secure. 
 
I am happy to say, he has given me several new rules in the past month. 
 
- I am to wear something he gave me to bed each night. I already had the rule that I am to wear something during the day but he believes that night time when I am lying there alone in the dark is an impressionable time and what better to think about than my submission to him. Over the years, he has bought me two t-shirts from sporting events we attended. One from the Seattle Mariners and the other from the Rat City Roller Girls. He also gave me a pair of pink pajamas from Victoria's Secret which I love. I asked if he would give me some of his shirts to sleep in and he actually gave me one of his  t-shirts from Starbucks. This meant so much to me especially since it was one of his favorite's. I feel so submissive when I have it on and it has become my favorite thing to wear to bed. I love to sleep naked but I do need to ask Sir's permission. When he allows it, I usually put on one of the necklace's he gave me to satisfy that requirement.
 
- Sir does not like the colors pink and red together so he said I am not to wear these colors together. Separate is fine. It is a quirky rule but I like it :) 

- I have been doing yoga on and off for a couple of years now. While I love it in many ways, lately I haven't been going as much as I used to or should. I mentioned this to Sir who then decided from now on, I must go to class a minimum of 2 times per week. This has kept me motivated and I have gone at least twice every week with fail. It improves not only my mind but my body and I am very happy to have this as a new rule in my life.

-I need to be accountable for my actions and words. In the past, if I did or didn't do something I was supposed to, instead of simply saying I failed to do it and I take full responsibility for that, I instead would come up with all these excuses and outside road blocks to justify why. I never realized how often I did this! I must say I have become much more conscious of this. Well, at least with Sir anyway...
 
-I am not to argue or disagree with Sir. Of course, it I have something important to discuss, I may respectfully do so. This is more about those snarky argumentative remarks. For example, I am not to be late to any of our meetings. A couple of weeks ago I was to meet him at his house. He told me I was late and I immediately raised my voice and said "No I wasn't". The way I did it was not submissive at all. The funny thing is that if he hadn't pointed it out, I would never have noticed. Submission has really made me more self aware and take a hard look at ingrained behaviors. I am happy to report that last time I saw him, he told me quite pleased how far I came here. I felt that temptation arise but before I actually said something, I was able to stop myself and act properly.
 
I am quite happy he has added all of these rules and rituals and they have only make my submission stronger.
 
 

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Rituals you can practice to prove your dedication to your Submission

Rituals are very important when you are submissive. The repetitiveness keeps the brain wired to that habit. It also keeps you focused on serving your dominant. Here are a few ideas on how to prove just how dedicated you are to serving him.
 
Tokens of servitude - This can be a collar, jewelry or something that you can wear. These  items symbolize giving up control of your sexual being to him. Each day the you would be be required to wear something given to her by her Dom that symbolizes his ownership of you. It doesn't have to be just one item. As long as you are wearing something that was given to you by him each and every day, this would be sufficent. I believe this is an excellent reinforcement of submission. T has been so generous to his horny bitch which makes this ritual very easy for me. I have multiple necklace's, earrings, nipple ring, scarf, clothes and panties from him. More than enough to be able to wear at least one of them every day. The obvious idea behind this is that you are reminded that he controls you every time you see the item you are wearing.

Choosing your outfit for the day -  This can be either by having him choose between two outfits you to present him or if knows your wardrobe well, having him simply tell you "Wear_____ today."

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First thing in the morning and last thing before bed rituals - To many, this are the most important times to reinforce submission. They are designed so it is the first thing you think of in the morning and the last thing your think about before going to sleep. One such ritual, we do is texting when I am going to bed. I have been a bit liberal about it lately and sometimes continue to do things after I have told him I am going to bed. As of this writing, I am making the vow to only text after I have done everything I need to do and I am going straight to sleep. Other such rituals include a morning text, chanting (kind of strange to me....), or a ritualized bedtime routine. Some other things that would only apply you lived together, are waking him every morning by sucking his cock or kneeling next to the bed each night and asking his permission to join him. Those last two make me especially wet when I think about them!

Menial tasks - This would include activities like cleaning, running errands or any pretty much any task your Dom may need done. Serving him dinner falls under this category and is one of my personal favorites. I have found this incredibly fulfilling to my need to serve even though it has been fairly difficult for me to pull off with much poise and grace! It requires me to concentrate during the absolute height of my horniness which is something I clearly need work on. Every time I have made dinner for him, I later remember of all the things I forgot or didn't get right and can't believe how scattered I had been all because I could not focus during my heightened state of arousal. Practicing and hopefully one day perfecting this would be a huge milestone in my goal to master self-control. My ideal would be able to concentrate long enough to present a whole meal to him flawlessly. I don't want to suppress my horniness though rather just manage it. Other ideas in this category could only be used if you lived with your Dom. Some examples would be bringing him breakfast or coffee in bed each morning, waking him in a unique and repetive way, drawing a bath etc

Research and write a weekly report on a new subject - Either the Dom or Sub would pick one subject per week (or month) that has something to do with domination, submission, sex, or other bdsm related topics.You would then write an informative report on it to present to him. The possible topics are endless. I like this idea mostly because the subject matter is of great interest to me and because I am a weirdo that likes to write reports! The paper would be due on the exact same day every week. This is a great opportunity to learn new ideas or fun things to do in the lifestyle. Buying, using and reviewing a new sex toy would be another variation on this.

Offering of Sub to others - Here the Dom reserves the right to give you to others to use as he sees fit. We have discussed this quite a bit lately and ithas caused me a lot of anxiety. It feels erotic and somewhat right to share T with a woman. There is something that really turns me on to think of him telling me exactly what I should do to her. If he says to kiss her, I would kiss her. If he says to lick her pussy, I would do so without hesitation as well as without promoting my own agenda. However, the thought of being with a man absolutely terrifies me. I can only imagine how awkward that would be. Again, not all Dom's like to share so if that is the case, this wouldn't be for you. This act holds a limited appeal to me but as the obedient little slut I am, if he decides to share me, be it with a woman or with a man, I will obey without hesitation or complaint.

Learn the art of body massage - One submissive woman I met, just recently signed up for a class on this and told me it was not too late to register if I was interested. I would enjoy learning massage because it such a sensual act and would be so relaxing for him. The benefit of this is that not only would it  be an act of serving but it would also require me to practice extreme restraint, something I consistently struggle with. Simply seeing him makes me lose immediate control of any sexual restraint. To have to strategically massage him without losing my focus and without attempting to manipulate him into fucking me immediately would be horribly difficult! I was told that massage is very task oriented when you know what you are doing. It’s not just rubbing anywhere for however long you feel like it but a process that requires time and precision.

 Gifts to your Dom - This includes either things or people to play with. I personally love other women and would love to find a long term relationship with one to compliment my relationship with T. Because of the time and effort involved as well as intimacy and acceptance needed, this is a very strong reinforcement of submission. Included here would be progress report. It helps me stay organized and keep track of the where iI am in the process of wooing any given woman. I know that not everybody has an open relationship and would never dream of sharing your Dom with other women but for those who do, it shows how seriously you takes his pleasure and the lengths that you will go to find him a plaything or even better, a new ongoing relationship for you both.

 Watching your Dom fuck someone - This would also include knowing that D is fucking someone and processing all the details. This has been a huge adrenaline rush for me and has expanded both my pain and pleasure thresholds. I been with T when he fucked someone but the it is the times he texts me moments before he is going to fuck someone surprisingly invokes more emotion. This may be due to being deprived of being fucked myself which causes wrenched envy or just a case of my deviant imagination running wild and my body responding to it. Whatever the cause, I have learned an incredible amount about myself from both scenario's. I desperately would like further opportunities to experience this mind altering experience as I know the room for my personal growth is still enormous in both situations. I am looking forward to taking it a step further and seeing him out with someone, then leaving knowing that he will be fucking her shortly. Simply seeing a picture of the woman he was going to be with stepped up the reaction \quite a bit so it will be interesting to see what physically seeing both of them together in person will be like. I also think about what it would be like to see him fuck someone in person who didn't know I was there while I must sit by quietly and watch. If we wanted to add a step before that, I could try this while watching remotely by camera as well.

These are just a few ideas's you can try to cement your submission but the possiblities are really never ending especially when you have deviant minds like T and I do :)